Mrs. Mager

"When I first got off the bus I felt shy

but I knew I had the nicest teacher in the school. "

-Isabella Burke

on the first day of 2nd Grade

September, 2007

Jen Mager, Jen Ogden, Mrs. Mager, Ms. Ogden

How can she be gone when she was so present?

She warmed our school

our church

our community

with her smile
and her light.

Everyone she touched felt

special

fortunate

loved.

And now we are

lonely, sad and equally at a loss.

"I can't think of her not alive, mommy..."

No one can.

(See Newsday article)

Politicole

Look, the truth is that I am a very political person and I am having such a hard time keeping my opinions to myself. I know that lots of people think that religion and politics are off limits in conversation, and I try to respect that as much as possible. These are personal feelings, especially in the case of religion. On the other hand, I think the conversations need to be had. We need to be informed and we need to know what each other is thinking. Even if we don't agree.

Well, at least I need to converse about it. The following was written by Eve Ensler. I have a tremendous amount of respect and admiration for her, so most of her words are meaningful to me. These in particular, though, really articulate all that disturbs me most about Governor Palin. Yes it is definitely one person's opinion. But it is my opinion too.

Drill, Drill, Drill

I am having Sarah Palin nightmares. I dreamt last night that she was a member of a club where they rode snowmobiles and wore the claws of drowned and starved polar bears around their necks. I have a particular thing for Polar Bears. Maybe it's their snowy whiteness or their bigness or the fact that they live in the arctic or that I have never seen one in person or touched one. Maybe it is the fact that they live so comfortably on ice. Whatever it is, I need the polar bears.I don't like raging at women.

I am a Feminist and have spent my life trying to build community, help empower women and stop violence against them. It is hard to write about Sarah Palin. This is why the Sarah Palin choice was all the more insidious and cynical. The people who made this choice count on the goodness and solidarity of Feminists.But everything Sarah Palin believes in and practices is antithetical to Feminism which for me is part of one story -- connected to saving the earth, ending racism, empowering women, giving young girls options, opening our minds, deepening tolerance, and ending violence and war.I believe that the McCain/Palin ticket is one of the most dangerous choices of my lifetime, and should this country chose those candidates the fall-out may be so great, the destruction so vast in so many areas that America may never recover. But what is equally disturbing is the impact that duo would have on the rest of the world. Unfortunately, this is not a joke. In my lifetime I have seen the clownish, the inept, the bizarre be elected to the presidency with regularity.

Sarah Palin does not believe in evolution. I take this as a metaphor. In her world and the world of Fundamentalists nothing changes or gets better or evolves. She does not believe in global warming. The melting of the arctic, the storms that are destroying our cities, the pollution and rise of cancers, are all part of God's plan. She is fighting to take the polar bears off the endangered species list. The earth, in Palin's view, is here to be taken and plundered. The wolves and the bears are here to be shot and plundered. The oil is here to be taken and plundered. Iraq is here to be taken and plundered. As she said herself of the Iraqi war, "It was a task from God."

Sarah Palin does not believe in abortion. She does not believe women who are raped and incested and ripped open against their will should have a right to determine whether they have their rapist's baby or not.

She obviously does not believe in sex education or birth control. I imagine her daughter was practicing abstinence and we know how many babies that makes.

Sarah Palin does not much believe in thinking. From what I gather she has tried to ban books from the library, has a tendency to dispense with people who think independently. She cannot tolerate an environment of ambiguity and difference. This is a woman who could and might very well be the next president of the United States. She would govern one of the most diverse populations on the earth.

Sarah believes in guns. She has her own custom Austrian hunting rifle. She has been known to kill 40 caribou at a clip. She has shot hundreds of wolves from the air.

Sarah believes in God. That is of course her right, her private right. But when God and Guns come together in the public sector, when war is declared in God's name, when the rights of women are denied in his name, that is the end of separation of church and state and the undoing of everything America has ever tried to be.

I write to my sisters. I write because I believe we hold this election in our hands. This vote is a vote that will determine the future not just of the U.S., but of the planet. It will determine whether we create policies to save the earth or make it forever uninhabitable for humans. It will determine whether we move towards dialogue and diplomacy in the world or whether we escalate violence through invasion, undermining and attack. It will determine whether we go for oil, strip mining, coal burning or invest our money in alternatives that will free us from dependency and destruction. It will determine if money gets spent on education and healthcare or whether we build more and more methods of killing. It will determine whether America is a free open tolerant society or a closed place of fear, fundamentalism and aggression.

If the Polar Bears don't move you to go and do everything in your power to get Obama elected then consider the chant that filled the hall after Palin spoke at the RNC, "Drill Baby Drill." I think of teeth when I think of drills. I think of rape. I think of destruction. I think of domination. I think of military exercises that force mindless repetition, emptying the brain of analysis, doubt, ambiguity or dissent. I think of pain.Do we want a future of drilling? More holes in the ozone, in the floor of the sea, more holes in our thinking, in the trust between nations and peoples, more holes in the fabric of this precious thing we call life?

Eve Ensler September 5, 2008

Procrastination Temptation

I have so much to clean up. So much to organize. I am actually, as I type, knee deep in papers that I've been going through. Well, actually they're in the other room, the piles of crap, and I came in here to escape. And procrastinate.

The computer is such a distraction for me. It's like a Siren, calling me into the virtual abyss, keeping me from being productive and completing projects. It calls me like the TV used to call me before I cancelled my cable subscription. Now, with only 15 or so channels, it's not so tempting. But this Internet. This computer - oh how I drown in its layers. How it cradles my mind, protecting me from my real life and all that I am supposed to be doing. Ahh sweet surrender...

I need to get away from it now. I need to get back to my real life. But I've always been bad at resisting temptation and I've always enjoyed a really great escape. The pull is strong and there are so many unread emails. Just 5 more minutes...

I am sitting at a table and across from me is a large mirror. I just looked up and caught sight of myself, and I didn't entirely like what I saw. My eyes are red and tired-looking and I look drunk with virtual information and disheveled from the fight. And I can actually see what I have become, having given in to the tempting escape once again. I feel like a junkie.

I have to go. I really really have to go now. Please don't ask me to stay any longer. Please...

Sleepless in Minneapolis

I am so sick over this fiasco of a Republican National Convention, I can hardly talk about it. Ever since last Friday's announcement about Sarah Palin, my stomach has been in knots. I started writing about how great it was that the Republicans have finally had to admit how everyone makes mistakes. What with Sarah Palin's expectant daughter, Cindy McCain's former addiction to pain killers and the fact that McCain met Cindy while he was married to his first wife, they have covered all the scandals all at once. I felt smug and satisfied.

But then, after listening to last night's beatings of Obama, I couldn't sleep. Palin is the perfect cheerleader for their team. She's cute. She's smart. She's feisty. And she's mean! And now, watching McCain's speech... fight fight fight... USA! USA! My stomach continues to turn.

This isn't a pep rally, you know? This is the next presidential election. I was telling the kids at dinner that I had to stay up to watch McCain's speech and my youngest said, "So many speeches! Is this really so important?" And I had to explain to my children how very important this election is.

I've been thinking about it all day. Whomever is elected in November will most likely be president when I send my first two kids to college. This is the person who will bring about an end to the war in Iraq, or bring additional wars in Iran and maybe Russia. The decisions this person makes will steer our economy either deeper into a recession or back out into the light. There is so much at stake.

As I watched the beautifully portrayed biographical video about McCain, I had this creepy feeling in my gut. The Republicans don't want to lose this election. They have lots at stake too. They have the best strategists working for them. (Let's face it - they got W re-elected in 2004). They seemed to know that Sarah Palin was just what this campaign needed.

What if they win? What if McCain and Palin win??

Shit. I need a Tylenol PM.