Something has just occurred to me, just now while reading Is There Really a Human Race? by Jamie Lee Curtis and Laura Cornell to my youngest daughter. I am afraid I haven't been teaching my children the really important lessons of life.So much of my time and energy is spent on pushing the kids to be more independent and help out around the house, as well as learning their lessons, doing their homework, practicing their instruments, brushing their teeth, going to bed on time and getting up early enough. Oh and a lot of time is spent on asking them to treat one another and myself more respectfully.
So many questions come up for which the answer is "no" but which require long explanations and sometimes apologies.
"Can I buy another webkinz?"
"Can we get cable?"
"Can I go on the computer?"
"Can we get a giant horned toad?"
The thing is that day-to-day living and developing routines and good habits takes up 99.5% of the day. And I'm afraid I may be missing the "big" issues.
Of course we talk about the golden rule and how we need to treat others the way we would like to be treated. And another thing that isn't neglected is feelings and emotions. We cover that on a daily basis, sometimes hourly, when it's a day off from school.
But I think the time has come for me to start to focus on some of the bigger more philosophical issues. These are things I believe and I would like my kids to learn. The words in the book are brilliant:
Sometimes it's better not to go fast.
There are beautiful sights to be seen when you're last.
Shouldn't it be that you just try your best?
And that's more important than beating the rest?
Shouldn't it be looking back at the end
that you judge your own race by the help that you lend?
So take what's inside you and make big, bold choices.
And for those who can't speak for themselves,
use bold voices.
Make friends and love well,
Bring art to this place.
And make the world better
for the whole human race.
Now let's see. How can I fit that in. How about, "No, honey, we can't get a horned toad. But be sure to use a bold voice to speak for those who can't speak for themselves!" Yeah. That's the ticket.
4 comments:
Great post. How indeed can people teach children about what's really important as we go through our everyday days?
Reading thought-provoking books together seems like a good way to start a discussion, but children do pick up on the unspoken undercurrents of life more than we think. There's a message in all the direction we give, the things we have anxiety about, what we do, and to a lesser extent, what we say.
Oh Lord. I'm sending a messge through the things I have anxiety about??
It's got to be one of those really long messages that the machine cuts off.
I agree, terrific post. I often wonder if I am teaching my children all the "right" ways to live life. One of the things on your list is 'trying our best'- it is funny that no matter how many times I tell my frustrated daughter that it/you "doesn't have to be perfect as long as you tried your best." She hates those words, and I wonder now (after reading what Nan wrote in her comment) if she is picking up on my actions or reactions. Interesting.
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